Kissing You
by Mrs Carmichael
Summary: He kisses her and suddenly she finds herself kissing him back. For the first time, she’s letting her heart rule her head but will she live to regret that moment or will she embrace the possibility of a relationship with the one she’s longed for? Reddie xx


**Hey everyone! Here's another Reddie one-shot from me. Ever since since seeing the kiss last Wednesday, I have been in a permanent Reddie frenzy and wrote this.**

**Let me know what you think!**

**Kissing You**

**Summary: He kisses her and suddenly she finds herself kissing him back. For the first time, she's letting her heart rule her head but will she live to regret that moment or will she embrace the possibility of a relationship with the one she's longed for? Reddie, from Rachel's POV.**

"Are you calling me a liar?" I ask as I walk towards Eddie putting my hands out to his back, to get him to face me.

Eddie Lawson, my deputy. I meant what I said at the drinks reception we had for him and Melissa at the end of last term, I couldn't have a better deputy, I don't know what I'd do without him. He looks a lot different out of school, I don't even know why that came as a surprise to me, he's still the same Eddie Lawson though, devastatingly handsome. It's not the first time I've noticed that, in fact, I've noticed that so many times, I've lost count. I kept it to myself, because I couldn't have him. He'd chosen Melissa, or so I thought, turns out that I was wrong about that too. When it came to the crunch, he chose me, I don't even know why, I wish I did. He turns around to face me, "Oh, I'm far too much of a gentleman to say that," he replies, he smiles at me, the smile soon vanishes and his eyes are drawn downwards.

For a brief moment, I wonder what he's staring at before it comes to me, he's staring down at my lips. I look down at his lips and then back up into his eyes. Deep down, I know what's going to happen next but I don't dare make the first move, just in case I'm wrong, I don't think I am but you can't be too sure. Something happened when we first met, sparks certainly flew when Rhea Cheatham introduced me to Eddie. For the first time, I felt something between the two of us, chemistry, not the kind you can fluke but real chemistry. I've never felt that before and certainly not as instantaneously as I did with him. Right from the start, there was something there between us and maybe now, I'll discover what that is.

Our bodies are close, I'm surprised he can't hear my heartbeat, racing at the fact that I'm in such close proximity to him. If it's even possible, my heart starts to beat faster as he leans forward, I tilt my head slightly and our lips meet in a kiss, our first kiss. I close my eyes, wanting to remember this moment forever. The first kiss is always supposed to be special, it certainly won't be the last, if I've got anything to do with it. A million thoughts and feelings are going through my head as he pulls away, Are we rushing into things? Is it too soon after Melissa? They say that the eyes are the window to the soul and as we stand face-to-face, Eddie's got the perfect view. My eyes meet his and go against every thought and feeling flickering through my brain. This has been there since day one and I'm not about to let my thoughts goad me into rejecting him again. I rejected him on the first day of the new term and then lost him to Melissa. I'm not going to make the same mistake twice. He made his choice and now I need to make mine.

He looks up into my eyes, looking for some sort sign, to indicate that he hasn't overstepped the mark and that I want this as much as he does, I do, I want this so much. He sees it, he sees the look in my eyes, telling him, without words, that I do want this. In my head, I say a silent prayer to Phillip, thanking him for ducking out of bowling with me and Eddie tonight because we both know this would not be happening had he been there.

He leans towards me and kisses me again, I respond by moving my hand onto his shoulder and around to the back of his neck. This time, I pull away and once more we lock gazes, I know that if we kiss again, we'll be beyond the point of no return, I've held these feelings inside me for so long, I just can't keep it to myself anymore, what I feel for Eddie is too beautiful for that. I lean towards him and this time, I kiss him, to assure him that I want this as much as he does, I always have but I didn't act on it, I was scared to make the first move. This time when we kiss, its more passionate than either of the previous two, I feel his arms wrap around me, pulling me closer and his hands between my shoulder blades. My hand moves into his hair and then back around his neck and then his shoulder as I drape my arms over his shoulders. We're completely lost in the kiss, not paying any attention to the people around us, not caring about the fact that we're in the middle of a game of bowling. At that moment, as our tongues gently explore the others mouth, I never want to leave the safety and security that his embrace and kiss is giving me. I break away to catch my breath but before long, I'm drawn back into the kiss, I just cannot resist it, I've given in to my feelings tonight and I can't take it back, even if I wanted to. I begin to move my arms from around his shoulders and break the kiss again, even though it's the last thing I want to do. He looks at me as I break the kiss, I can see it in his eyes, he's wondering whether that's it, whether this is as far as its going, whether I now regret kissing him back in a crowded bowling alley where anyone can see, I don't regret it, there's no reason to, he's a free agent, so am I, and this is what I've wanted for so long. I smile at him and lean my forehead against his, "I can tell what you're thinking Eddie," I say, audible only to him.

"You can?" he asks as he stares into my eyes, his arms still wrapped around me.

I nod as much as I can without moving my forehead away from his. "Now come on," I say, changing the subject, "I said I was going to whip your butt and we haven't even finished. We have to finish this game otherwise it will be a waste of your money."

"Do we have to?" he replies.

"Yes, we do," I say as I move my head away from his and pick up by ball.

I walk towards the line and I'm almost ready to let the ball go when at the last minute, I turn around and see Eddie's face, he's smiling and I know that it's for the same reason that I am smiling. I can't suppress it, I don't even want to and even if I tried, it would be as difficult as suppressing a yawn when you're tired. I turn around and pull my arm back before bringing it forwards and letting the ball fly down the alley. I didn't even notice that my last ball had knocked down all bar two of the pins; I was too wrapped up in teasing and flirting with Eddie to notice that. The ball knocked the remaining two pins down and I turned around to walk back towards Eddie, "beat that if you can, Mr Lawson," I say as I put my hands out to his chest, letting them linger there for a few moments.

Eddie reaches for his ball and trails his hand around my waist as he walks away. I laugh out loud as he puts another ball into the gutter. He turns back to me and smiles, his smile has always done something to me but this time different and this time is no different. His smile sets off the butterflies in my stomach, it's a mixture of both nerves and excitement because I'm wondering what's going to come next. This is the first time I've actually let my heart rule over my head and I'm not regretting it, it feels so right.

****

"Looks like I did whip your butt then Mr Lawson," I say as I look up at the scoreboard, confirming my massive victory over Eddie.

"I guess you did," he agrees.

I think it's fair to say that neither of us have been putting much effort into the bowling after the kiss, just thinking it over, wondering what it means for us now. "Do you want a drink before we go?" he asks as we head over to the reception desk to get our shoes back.

"Yeah, why not?" I reply as my shoes get handed back to me.

I walk over to one of the chairs and sit down to put my shoes on and soon enough, Eddie joins me. Once he's put his shoes on, he turns to me, "so, what can I get you to drink Rachel?" he asks.

I look at him and smile, "red wine please," I reply as I pick my bag up off the chair next to me and follow Eddie into the bar area.

I get us a little table in the corner and watch as he goes to get our drinks, I can't take my eyes off him, it seems mad but I'm not complaining. Eddie comes towards me with two glasses of red wine in hand and I snap out of my trance, trying not to make it obvious that I've just been staring at him for the past few minutes. I fail miserably, he notices and smiles at me, "you've been staring, I'm surprised you haven't got sore eyes," Eddies teases.

"You certainly are a sight for sore eyes," I reply as I pick up my wine glass and take a sip, "where to after this?" I ask after a few moments of silence.

"Back to my place," Eddie replies quickly.

He watches as I turn my head away, I look quickly back at him and see his face, he doesn't need to say it, I can see in his face that he's convinced he's said the wrong thing. Far from it, I want to, I want to so much. I feel Eddie's hands against my cheeks as he cups my face in his hands and turns it so I'm looking back at him, "Look Rachel…" he starts, "if you don't want to…we don't have to go back to mine, we can take this slowly, if that's what you want…"

I shake my head at him and put a finger to his lips to silence him, "I want to come back to yours, I'm just…" I reply, trying to find the right word, "nervous." I finish, trying to laugh it off.

Eddie smiles at me and presses a light kiss against my forehead; I shiver as I feel lips touch my skin. "I can understand why you're nervous Rachel," he says as he takes my hands in his, "what with your past and everything…"

I put my finger to his lips again, "let's not talk about my past," I respond, "I'm only interested in the present and the future."

Eddie nods as we both pick up our glasses and begin to drink what's left. Once both our wine glasses are empty, we both begin to fumble around for our car keys. "Just follow me in your car," Eddie says, "that way you can still get back to yours if you wanted to."

"Is that some kind of subtle hint that you don't want me to come back to yours after all?" I jokingly tease him as I stand up, knowing that was as far away from the truth as possible, he wanted me back at his and I wanted to be back at his.

"Of course not," he replied as he follows my lead and wraps an arm around my waist as we walk towards the exit.

We reluctantly part from each other when we reach our cars in the car park. Despite the fact that I know I'm going to be at his in probably less than half an hour, it seems like nothing sort of torture to be apart from him. He leans towards me and kisses me softly on the lips, "just follow my car," he says when he pulls away, "I won't deliberately get you lost."

"You wouldn't dare," I reply.

He smiles once more as he walks round to the driver's side of his car and gets inside. I do the same and soon enough, I'm following his car out of the bowling alley car park, on the way back to his place.

****

I follow his car through the streets of Rochdale and the journey seems to be taking forever, and the fact its taking forever has nothing to do with the fact that time seems to crawl whenever you're waiting for something that you want so much, its more to do with the fact that Eddie's driving at a snails pace in front of me. I beep my horn at him in an attempt to get him to go faster. Without any warning, he puts his foot down and speeds off. For a brief moment, I do wonder whether he is going to deliberately get me lost, I'll pay him back for that later. I do eventually catch up to him and he begins to drive at a normal pace, better late than never I say!

Within a few minutes, Eddie parks his car up in the space outside his house. I park a little bit further behind, just getting in wherever I can. Once I get out of my car, bringing my bag with me before locking it, I walk towards where Eddie parked his car and walk round to the driver's side. "I can't believe you did that!" I exclaim, hitting him playfully on the shoulder.

"Did what?" he asks, flashing me the innocent cheesy schoolboy smile that I'm so used to seeing from the students, not him.

"Driving at a snails pace, then speeding off, were you trying to lose me?" I ask jokingly, knowing that he was just playing games.

"Never!" he exclaims as he wraps his arms around me.

I smile at him, "right answer," I say as he lets go of my waist and locks up his car before heading up the path towards his door.

I follow him up the path and he puts his key into the door and unlocks the door. He turns to me and steps aside to let me in first, "thanks," I say, smiling softly at him as he walk into the hallway.

He follows me inside and locks the door behind the two of us. I walk into the living room and look around, "this isn't your usual bachelor pad," I say as Eddie enters the living room.

"Yeah, I know. Since me and Alison started talking properly, I've been seeing a lot more of Michael, he's been around here a few times," Eddie replies.

I turn around just in time to see the smile upon his face, I know how much he loves his son, I've seen it already. He walks towards me and wraps his arms around my waist, pulling me closer to him, I giggle as he does, he just took me by surprise. Eddie leans towards me again and kisses me softly on the lips. I kiss him back and wrap my arms around his shoulders, once again losing myself in his embrace, it feels right being here. There's been so many times in these past weeks that I've wondered what it would feel like to be kissed by him, I've dreamt about it so many times but now, my dreams are becoming reality. No more dreaming about it now though, I'm here, in his arms, kissing him and allowing him to kiss me back. I pull away when oxygen depletion becomes too much. He looks at me, wondering why I've broken the kiss, wondering whether I'm having second thoughts about being back here, whether being back here is bringing back memories of a past I'd sooner forget. All this is going through his head and I know, because his eyes are voicing all his thoughts, without words. He cups my face in his hands again and looks me in the eyes, "I meant what I said Rachel, we can take this slowly if that's what you want," he says, my eyes start fill up at his compassion, Eddie is the most amazing man I have ever met, the man who has completely captured my heart, I can't fight this urge any longer, I'm not even sure whether it's a case of can't fight it or won't fight it. I think it's the latter, I had to fight the urge while he was with Melissa, now he's not, we're both single, we're not hurting anyone, the only people we'll hurt if we don't act on this now is ourselves, drawing it out any longer would make it unbearable, especially after he kissed me at the bowling alley.

"I do want this Eddie, I promise," I finally reply after several moments of silence.

He smiles at me; I know how happy he is to hear those words. Eddie leans across and kisses me softly on the lips once more. This time, he pulls away and takes hold of my hand, lacing his fingers through mine. He begins to walk towards the living room door and I follow him. My heart starts to pound again, knowing what's going to happen next. Only this time, it actually means something to me, this time it's not simply going through the motions in exchange for payment, it's giving my heart and soul to someone who I have loved from the moment we first met. It's been a long time coming and I know that everything we've been through in the past has been leading up to this moment, the moment when we finally admit our feelings for one another in the heat of our passion. As I follow him up the stairs to his bedroom, I know that this is right, this is the culmination of all the thoughts and feelings that have been going through my head since the moment Eddie chose me over Melissa, the final piece of a jigsaw which completes the both of us. Once we get to his bedroom door, he lets go of my hand and opens the door, moving his hand to the small of my back. He pulls me closer to him again and kisses me, I respond to his kiss, moving my hands around his neck. Eddie moves his other arm around my waist and to pull me into the bedroom, I don't resist as I want this as much as he does. Once we're both inside the bedroom, he removes his hand from my waist and pushes the bedroom door closed. Now there's definitely no escape, and I don't want to escape the safe haven I have found with Eddie, not ever.

****

"WOW!" I breathlessly exclaim a while later as I sink back into the pillow, I have no other words to describe it. It was definitely worth the wait.

"Hmmm," he murmurs, his voice is barely audible as his head is buried into the crook of my neck.

He looks up at me and smiles; he leans down and presses his lips to mine, softly and continuously until my breathing has almost returned to a normal pace. He pulls away and I smile at him, I can't stop myself, I'm just so unbelievably happy at the moment, these past few hours have been a complete whirlwind for both of us, and I wouldn't have it any other way. I catch his eye again and he grins back at me, putting his hand on my cheek and running his fingers through my hair. He puts his forehead to mine and stares deeply into my eyes, I'm wondering what he's thinking, wondering what's coming because I have no idea. "I love you Rachel," he says to me.

I stare back into his eyes and all of a sudden, the grin upon my face gets wider. For first time, those three words actually mean something, they mean more to me because they've come from him and I know I feel the same way. "I love you too Eddie," I reply.

I look at him intently, and see the smile spread across his face; I know he's happy to hear those words. I smile back at him, knowing that those three words have come from the bottom of my heart and I will never take them back. He leans down and presses his lips softly to mine, I deepen the kiss by pushing my tongue into his mouth and cupping his face in my hands, not letting him move away, even if he wanted to. We break away, breathless and he rolls off of me. Immediately, I miss the feeling of having him so close. He rests his head on the pillow next to me and I slide over to him and rest my head in the crook of his neck, breathing in the smell of cologne mingled with sweat that I've come to associate with him. I feel him wrap his arm around me and I feel safe, knowing that he's there. I was closed off from love before I met him, I didn't need the pain that love usually brought with it, Eddie Lawson was the one who broke through those defences, so I could love him and love him like I'd never loved anyone before. I feel his arm moving up and down my back and I smile to myself, knowing that he's always going to be there because he feels the same way about me as I do about him. My eyes begin to close and I don't try to stop them, knowing that Eddie's there beside me. For once, my dreams won't be plagued by nightmares of the fire because the man I love is sleeping beside me, he's there for me and for that, I'll always be thankful.

* * *

**Comments please!**

**Also let me know if you'd like to read the sequel that I'm writing for this story.**

**xxx**


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